The logical conclusion of the gun ban lobby's rhetoric: Ban everything

by Gerard Valentino

The anti-gun lobby spends a lot of time and money scaring Americans about what might happen if honest people are allowed more leeway in how, and where, they carry guns. All along, they assured us that gun-related disaster is a likely outcome each time a new pro-gun reform is suggested.

Concealed Carry laws were sure to lead to Wild West shootouts, Castle Doctrine and Stand Your Ground reform was going to turn Florida into a war zone. Chicago Mayor Richard Daley guaranteed that an end to his pet gun ban would lead to an increase in the murder rate. Now that the Chicago gun ban has been struck down by the U.S. Supreme Court, and he is sure to be proved wrong, Daley chose to announce his retirement.

Over the years, none of the predictions made by anti-gun extremists came true and their failed predication rate makes Miss Cleo seem like a true visionary.

Unfortunately, the anti-gun gang was still able to make hay because people, in general, are scared of the future.

A key piece of the anti-gun stance against guns is that a given gun might be used to kill someone, or a given law-abiding citizen might snap and go on a killing spree. If we transfer the anti-gun argument into other public policy issues it better illustrates how they use fear to push limitations on gun ownership.

Remember that airplanes and helicopters might crash, just as a gun might kill someone, so banning air travel is clearly a good idea, based on anti-gun logic. The same is true with cars. And since we know that surgery is incredibly dangerous and might lead to premature death, we need to outlaw surgeons.

Based on the anti-gun mindset the government also needs to ban riding in a bus, going to school, eating fatty food and having kids. It might be hard to perpetuate the species, but historically child birth is dangerous to both woman and child, so it must be outlawed.

People are easily hurt riding a horse or a bicycle and we can't even consider allowing honest citizens to own something as potentially dangerous as a motorcycle. Golf clubs, baseball bats, rope, kitchen knives, lamps and even the television remote have all been used to hurt another human being, so it only makes sense to remove them from America's households as well.

Dogs might bite, a clear detriment to society. And too many people are allergic to cats for them to remain legal.

Peanut allergies are incredibly dangerous so only people willing to risk public safety could condone private ownership of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Sadly, school age kids everywhere will also lose another lunch time staple – bologna – because people are often injured in the factories where it is produced.

All participation sports need to be banned including baseball, football, golf, hockey, soccer, lacrosse, tennis, squash, volleyball, basketball and even the childhood game foursquare is far too dangerous for the average citizen.

It isn't enough to simply have participants wear safety gear because, as the anti-gun movement tells us, carrying a gun for protection makes people take risks. So, we have to assume that wearing a football helmet, knee pads or a hockey helmet will surely make anyone take part in risky on-field behavior.

The only theory more absurd than outlawing nearly every possible human behavior is infringing on the right to bear arms because the anti-gun crowd claims something bad might happen. They have to provide an explanation of how Americans exercise the right to bear arms will lead to a serious risk to public safety.

Since they lack the statistics to prove permissive gun laws lead to an increase in gun-related deaths or injuries, and since gun control has been an abysmal failure in America, all the anti-gun extremists have to call on is their ability to predict the future.

Las Vegas casinos use the inability of people to predict the future as a way to make billions of dollars each year. The laws of probability tell us that gamblers can occasionally beat the house and that scam artist fortune tellers will get things right from time to time. Amazingly, however, the anti-gun movement has beaten the odds and managed to get their predictions wrong each and every time.

So, when the television weatherperson tells us it might rain, we throw an umbrella in the car just in case. But, when the anti-gun movement tells us that a pro-gun reform will lead to untold suffering, we roll our eyes.

Gerard Valentino is a member of the Buckeye Firearms Foundation Board of Directors and the author of "The Valentino Chronicles – Observations of a Middle Class Conservative," available through the Buckeye Firearms Association store.